Fudge

Australia Day never fails to rock - I'm shattered. After many years in this game I've developed a theory: for effective recovery, one's hours at sleep must at least equal one's hours at bar. A more preferable equation is: imbibing period + 1/3 = snooze length... but who has the time these days?

Unfortunately however, all play & no sleep makes BPP a rather scary girl. After a brief 4 hr nap I still reek of smoke, my mascara had migrated so far south I think it's now classified as blush, eyes are currently the shade of Dorothy's magic slippers (where the hell are those bastards when you need them?!), & I'm fairly certain a small animal crawled into my mouth sometime during the night & died. Having a very hard time remaining vertical so I officially declare this a lazy blog day - cut & paste is my friend. Now, off to find a cupboard to curl up in...

The Word Fuck

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word 'fuck'. It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate. In language, 'fuck' falls into many grammatical categories.

It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John).

It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck).

It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she's also stupid).

As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word 'fuck'. Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations...

Greetings "How the fuck are ya?"

Suspicion "Who the fuck are you?"

Fraud "I got fucked by the car dealer."

Resignation "Oh, fuck it!"Trouble "I guess I'm fucked now."

Aggression "FUCK YOU!"

Disgust "Fuck me."

Confusion "What the fuck.......?"

Difficulty "I don't understand this fucking business!"

Despair "Fucked again..."

Pleasure "I couldn't be fucking happier."

Displeasure "What the fuck is going on here?"

Lost "Where the fuck are we."

Disbelief "UNFUCKING BELIEVABLE!"

Retaliation "Up your fucking ass!"

Denial "I didn't fucking do it."

Perplexity "I know fuck all about it."

Apathy "Who really gives a fuck, anyhow?"

Panic "Let's get the fuck out of here."

Directions "Fuck off."

Disbelief "How the fuck did you do that?"

It can be used in an anatomical description- "He's a fucking asshole."

It can be used to tell time- "It's five fucking thirty."

It can be used in business- "How did I wind up with this fucking job?"

It can be maternal- "Mother fucker."

It can be political- "Fuck Tony Blair!"

It has also been used by many notable people throughout history...

"What the fuck was that?"- Mayor of Hiroshima
"Where the fuck is all this water coming from?"- Captain of the Titanic
"That's not a real fucking gun." - John Lennon
"Who's gonna fucking find out?"- Richard Nixon
"Heads are going to fucking roll."- Anne Boleyn
"Let the fucking woman drive." - Commander of Space Shuttle Challenger
"What fucking map?" - Mark Thatcher
"Any fucking idiot could understand that."- Albert Einstein
"It does so fucking look like her!"- Picasso
"How the fuck did you work that out?"- Pythagoras
"You want what on the fucking ceiling?" - Michaelangelo
"Fuck a duck."- Walt Disney
"Why?- Because its fucking there!" - Edmund Hilary
"I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?" - Joan of Arc
"Scattered fucking showers my ass." - Noah