They call this a muddle puddle tweetle poodle beetle noodle bottle paddle battle

Listen to BPP kids. BPP knows a little bit about art. BPP highly recommends you get your dirty little mits on a copy of this.

Christmas Quiz #1

'Tis the season to be pursuing the trivial! I leave for my magical 1st White Christmas adventure on the slopes of Serre Chevalier in exactly a week from now, and in celebration I'm knocking out some fun Noel quizzes for the gang. We have 4 days there before the 25th - so a quiz a day!

Of course this move will no doubt attract much negativity, derision, taunting, name calling, personal attacks and the odd spot of physical violence, but I don't care! I'm going to drag this crew, kicking & screaming into some seasonal spirit. When I'm done with them they'll look like a pack of proverbial carollers (or I'll end up looking like Jimmy Stewart on that bridge in It's A Wonderful Life).

Christmas Quiz #1 Christmas Songs

• The Kids in Girl and Boy land will have a jubilee
  Santa Claus is Coming to Town
• There's a happy feeling nothing in the world can buy, When they pass around the coffee and the pumpkin pie
  Sleigh Ride
• The fire is slowly dying and my dear, we're still good bye-ing
  Let It Snow
• What a bright time, it's the right time, To rock the night away
  Jingle Bell Rock
• Oh, Ho, the mistletoe, up where you can see
  Holly Jolly Christmas
• What a beautiful sight. Jump in bed cover up your head
  Here Comes Santa Claus
• Through the years we all will be together, If the Fates allow
  Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
• Gosh oh gee, how happy I'd be, If I could only whistle (thhh)
  All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth
• Now the ground is white, go it while you're young, Take the girls tonight and sing this sleighing song;
  Jingle Bells
• Heedless of the wind and weather;
  Deck the Halls

The Fan-tom Menace

Phew! I tell you what people - I'm lucky to be here talking to you today. By all rights I should be 6 feet under! The hours my brother's and I spent with our faces pressed to the portable fan, distorting our voices in childish glee was in all actuality, a dangerous game of Russian roulette for very souls. According to those Krazy Koreans, my much lauded Darth Vader impersonation could have been fatal.

If only we had only known of the dark, seathing power within!

The Moral Steaks

Serious question guys: Is this the perfect Christmas present for my brothers (21 & 24), or is it just another sad reflection of a repugnantly bloated Western society so far past the point of reason and personal responsibility, that it sanctions the creation of basely egotistical and functionless commodities for the satisfaction of false and non-essential needs?

This elf says: ho, ho, hum.